Four Degrees Of Love

Posted by Jonathan Brink
October 23, 2009

This video (RSS See Embedded Video) is Dan Wilt reflecting on Bernard of Clairvaux’s Four Degrees of Love. Clairvaux, who was entrusted with the title “Doctor of the church” developed an understanding of love in degrees or depths.

First Degree: The love of self for self sake.
Second Degree: The love of God for self sake.
Third Degree: The love of God for God’s sake.
Fourth Degree: The love of self for God’s sake.

I appreciate the way Clairvaux put it.  At the highest order is loving the self for God’s sake.  Many times I see so many people stopping at the third degree (Piper) and missing out on the wholeness that comes from taking the final risk to actually love the self the way God designed us to.  And I understand why people do that.  We think we must expunge ourselves as part of the process in order to follow in the footsteps of Jesus.  But nothing could be further from the truth.

When Jesus also talks about denying the self, he’s talking about the false self, the one we have created in the world’s image, the one that destroys us because it’s a lie. We cannot love unless we are first loved.  The command to love our neighbor is compared not to love of God but love of the self.  Think about that. Jesus used loving ourselves as the measurement. The fullest reflection of love and being loved is inclusive of the self, not the absence or complete death of self.

If there is one thing I think needs to change in the ecclesia, it is this concept of loving the self for God’s sake, to take on the highest degree of love as an expression of what it means to follow Jesus.  And when we do, when we begin to love ourselves, revealing grace in the most profound way, we will truly reveal the Good News.

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love, video

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  • revev1969
    This was a huge realization for me...thanks for the reminder...

    http://monachusbellator.wordpress.com/2008/08/1...
  • jazzact13
    Are you seriously saying that any form of self-love is highest? You refer to Jesus' words about the two greatest commandments, without pointing out that in His own words Jesus said that the greatest command was to love God with all we have. Jesus did not use loving ourselves as the measure, but loving God was and is first.
  • Jazz, any form is your words, not mine.

    The context of the post is understand the second commandment and how it plays out. We can only love if we are first loved. That's why the first commandment is to love God, because it is here that we find love. But they highest expression of that love is found in loving the self for God's sake, meaning it is the highest expression of participating with God. It's participating in mission with God.

    The second commandment does not use God as the standard. It uses the self. And the reason is because the self is the indicator. If we did not love the self, which revealed we had accepted God's love (the first commandment), it was all bunk.
  • jazzact13
    --Jazz, any form is your words, not mine.

    And I know what it means. Any mean any, and I understand you and Clairvaux and Wilt as saying that "love of self" is highest, even higher then love of God. I see that being said in the degrees listed in your post. Even you yourself write "At the highest order is loving the self for God’s sake", which means it's higher than loving God in any way.

    Which is absolute nonsense, and you cannot (repeat: cannot) use Jesus' words about loving neighbor as self to justify such an obvious falsehood. Jesus said that the first command was to love God with all we are and have. To go from that saying that any love of self is higher than love of God is wrong.
  • Jazz, thanks for replying back and clarifying. I now see where we are crossing paths. The four degrees of love are not in opposition or exclusion to each other. There is no either/or. It's a both/and perspective. They are inclusive of each other, building on the previous.

    The idea of loving the self for God's sake is the highest order because it is completely inclusive of loving God. Loving the self is only possible when we are first loved by God.

    Another way to put it is like a puzzle. Each piece adds to the entire picture. Loving the self for God's sake is the last piece to the puzzle, because loving the self is the hardest part of the puzzle.
  • Julie
    I love this video. The church needs to hear this! I need to hear this.
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